Lawyers and Research Ruin Everything

For those of us on the creative side of advertising, there is nothing more infuriating than having an idea nibbled to death by ducks. It doesn't take much to turn something good into shit.Just one wrong word, one extra word, or one bad thought and an idea that's unique and memorable becomes just one more bad ad.A million years ago, there was a very effective campaign for Band-Aid. It consisted of

Einstein On Advertising

Albert Einstein was a pretty smart guy.What most people don't know about Einstein is that in addition to uncovering the laws of relativity, the equivalency of mass and energy, and predicting that the speed of light was constant, he also said -- without knowing it -- the smartest thing ever said about advertising.After his amazing successes as a young man, Einstein spent the rest of his life

Simplifiers and Complicators

About a thousand years ago I wrote a piece for ADWEEK called "Simplifiers and Complicators". It was so long ago, ADWEEK wasn't even called ADWEEK. It was called MAC.Every now and then I run into someone who reminds me of the piece. It happened again last week.I can't remember the specifics of the article, but the point was that there are two kinds of people: people who simplify things and people

Why Your Clients Hate You

Photos of the Cannes advertising whack-a-thon from Ad Age. Every room, martini, airline ticket, condom, shrimp cocktail, limo, line, and hooker subsidized by client ad budgets.

Maybe Not Cautious Enough

In an article on June 18th called "Brought To You By...Anyone?" The Washington Post chided "big brands" for being slow to adopt digital media in their advertising plans."While spending on Internet marketing has been growing dramatically over the past decade, the top 50 or 60 brand marketers are very much underrepresented," said Randall Rothenberg, president and chief executive of the Interactive

Just Toddlers With Money

One of my regular stops in the blogosphere is remarkable communication written by Sonia Simone, which is aimed at helping online marketers write and think better.She wrote a post last week called A Toddler's Guide To Salemanship which drew analogies between talking to customers and talking to three-year-olds.It reminded me of something my daughter used to do when she was a kid. We called it "

It's All About U

I never post on weekends, but I write on weekends.So it's actually Saturday morning now. And it's probably one of the most unusual Saturday mornings in at least a hundred years. Why? The two major league home run leaders this morning are guys whose last names begin with "U" -- Dan Uggla and Chase Utley.I want some of you tech and data geeks out there to scour the web and tell us if there has

Cliche Update

The Calibrated Cliche Counter -- TAC's proprietary marketing claptrap detector - reports that "engagement" is losing steam and "conversation" is gaining momentum.Check out this blog post in which a guy named David Deal (apparently a marketing director for Avenue A/Razorfish) uses the word "conversation" 4 times in one paragraph. We call that "leveraging the bullshit." Congratulations to David!TAC

How The Narcissistic Keep In Touch With The Feckless

The latest idiotic rage in "social media" is Twitter.For those of you who have been on another planet for the last year or so, Twitter is essentially a way for the narcissistic to keep in touch with the feckless.In short bursts, 140 characters or less, they post messages to their "friends" about what they're doing -- "Now I'm going to the dry cleaners." "Now I'm changing my shorts."As a blogger

Brilliant and Delusional

A very interesting ad guy named Tony Schwartz died this week. Tony was apparently a strange and remarkable person. You can read about him here.Tony was responsible for the most famous political spot ever created, called the "Daisy Ad", which you can see here.The spot was created for Lyndon Johnson during the presidential race of 1964. The spot was unquestionably one of the most brilliant -- and

Dumb and Desperate

The advertising community has convinced itself to go back 50 years and create its own tv shows to sponsor. Although now, of course, it has to have a bullshit name -- "branded entertainment" -- to make it more attractive to the nitwits who are doing it.“Branded entertainment brings the experience of the brand to the viewer...” said Mitch Sheiner, vice president and associate media director at...

Too Much Information

I had the pleasure of playing golf at Pebble Beach last week. On the first hole (par 4) I hit my second shot to within two feet of the hole. Although a mediocre golfer, I can make 2-footers 9 out of 10 times.Then the caddie said, "Play it just outside the left edge. Two-thirds of the ball outside the lip and one-third inside." As soon as he said that, I knew I would miss it. And, sure enough, I

How To Be Happy In Advertising

TAC is traveling today. Here's an oldie.Dr. AdContrarian is on duty today to help you be a happier ad person. Please have a seat.It's not easy being happy in advertising. It's a frustrating business. Modern life is filled with many horrors -- war, husbands, pizza with chicken on it... And we ad people are closely aligned with something uniquely horrible -- pop culture.Advertising used to be about

5 Good Things About Advertising

1. If you're in it long enough you'll use everything you know.2. It's the last stronghold of really smart C students.3. You get to look behind the curtain of lots of different kinds of businesses.4. If you pay attention, there is no other occupation that teaches you more thoroughly the difference between what people say and what they do.5. It's way more interesting than dry cleaning.

The Cluefree Manifesto

Nine years ago, something called the Cluetrain Manifesto appeared. It became a kind of web-geek Declaration of Independence in which online zealots threatened to hold their breath until someone paid attention to them. It is apparently the basis for the "coversationalist/social media" branch of online dogmatism.Always years behind the times, TAC came across it just last week, and published it on

5 Bad Things About Advertising

1. When we say it's an art, they say it's a business. When we say it's a business, they say it's an art.2. Ten million people see your mistakes every night.3. The good stuff often fails. The bad stuff often works.4. Success is never final.5. It's way harder than it looks.Coming tomorrow:The Cluefree Manifesto

Clueless

TAC seems to have become a pariah among the cult of web zealotry. You can read recent references to my stupidity at the following locations:HereHereHereandHereMy great sin has been to be skeptical about the effectiveness of online social media as a marketing tool.To get myself more familiar with this topic -- just in case it turns into a fist fight -- I tried going back to original sources.

Congratulations!

My wonderful daughter graduates high school this weekend. She makes me proud every day.

Friday Celebrity Roundup

Remember the time your mom got drunk?Embarrassing, wasn't it.-------------------------------------------------------------------What will we do without her?Susan Sarandon says that if John McCain wins the election, she will move to Canada or Italy.Finally, a reason to vote for McCain.Afterthought...Wish I had a dollar for every Hollywood phony who said (s)he would move to another country if

Grand Strategic Insights

One of the best pieces of advice I can give to anyone in marketing or advertising is this:Be eternally skeptical of grand strategic insightsPlanners, researchers and their ilk love to take a little information and turn it into a heroic vision. Beware of this. Most valuable insights are small and contingent.I was once at an advertising conference and a planning director was making a presentation.

Smart Guys Being Stupid

I read two really dumb things last week by two really smart guys.First was Seth Godin. He wrote a blog about Danny DeVito. Claimed that Danny DeVito had a better chance of becoming a star than George Clooney. Why?The math...tells us... ...everyone in Hollywood is trying to be George, there are a lot more opportunities for the few Dannys willing to show up. Invest in Danny. The edges usually pay

The Tyranny of Strategy

Advertising strategies are not handed down by God.They are written by planners, researchers, account execs, clients and other mildly retarded mortals.You only have to turn on the tv to notice that these people often get it wrong.Meanwhile, good creative people sometimes have a better feel for the problem than the committee that wrote the strategy. It is not unheard of for them to develop --

The Mindless Herd

Advertising has always been a trendy business. But the internet has driven the trendiness to new heights. It has turned ad agencies into a mindless herd, desperate to be on the cutting edge regardless of how much of their clients' money they are pissing away.For some time now TAC has been screaming that most advertising on "social media" is a monumental waste of money (see my guest blog on