More Social Media Baloney

Last month, in a post called "Zealots, Maniacs, And Hustlers," I said,..."we've developed a reputation for being anti-digital media and pro-traditional media.We are neither.We have no personal interest in, or allegiance to, any medium.Our only purpose is to fight bullshit, hyperbole and words without meaning. We are against zealots, maniacs and hustlers of any stripe."There is, perhaps, no area

Steroids Are Fine. Salt is Dangerous.

Every now and then, TAC reserves the right to blog about whatever the hell he feels like. Today is one of those days.I had a chance to visit new Yankee Stadium a few weeks ago and here are some thoughts about it.1. It's impressive but not beautiful. Nice wide corridors, grand main plaza, comfortable seats (at least where I was.) But it does not have the beauty of some of the newer parks.2. In

Blogging About Blogging

Back in the Middle Ages, when I was a creative director, I had a few strict rules:No talking animalsNo guys dressed as girlsNo celebrity's mothersNo ads about advertisingToday I'm going to break the spirit of one of those rules and blog about blogging.Here are a few random thoughts on the subject.1. Unpleasantness in advertising is not something new. As long as I've been in the business I've seen

Symptoms May Include

Dry mouthNauseaSudden and inexplicable death Dancing ahead of the beatCalling everyone "Billy"Fond memories of ParisBunting with men in scoring positionAsking your dentist for a dateHankering for kosher picklesNaive faith in golf tipsShaving one side onlyBeing nice to FrenchmenAbility to see magnetic wavesPutting both socks on one footCompulsion to sign non-compete agreementsQuestioning the rules

Things As They Really Are

One of the hardest things for agency people to do is to see things as they really are. Not as they'd like them to be. Not as they've heard they are. Not as they've read they are. Not as their company's philosophy says they are. But as they really are.The terribly difficult part about this is that you have to take yourself out of the equation. You have to understand that you are not typical. That

Warning: Beware Of Math

One of the most interesting aspects of the financial meltdown of the past few years is the role that mathematics played in it.Over several decades, Wall Street developed very sophisticated mathematical models of financial markets. During the 90's they were literally recruiting rocket scientists to work in investment houses.As we now know, everything they were doing turned out to be a bunch of

Clients Ask All The Wrong Questions

The Ad Contrarian will return from vacation Monday. Here's a post from last March.Any agency person who's ever participated in a new business pitch has been asked this question: "What is the process you use to develop advertising ideas?"Any agency person with an ounce of integrity has answered thusly: "Schmuck, there is no process."In other words, no agency person has ever answered that way.There

Branding's Final Absurdity?

The Ad Contrarian is on vacation until Monday. This post appeared in January of 2008.There's very little fun left in the ad business. But one of the big chuckles we still get (secretly) is watching our clients go through crazy "branding" exercises.These con games last for months, cost hundreds of thousands of dollars, and generally have less impact on business than cleaning the drapes.Nonetheless

Murder Most Productive

The Ad Contrarian is on vacation this week. Here is a post from January, 2008In Death by Branding TAC asserted that Southwest Airlines was on the way to ruining their brand with "branding."What makes their campaign so awful is that they're trying to convince business travelers that flying Southwest will make us "more productive." Right. That's the big airline issue for me. Not price. Not schedule

Puzzles And Mysteries

The Ad Contrarian is on vacation this week. Today's post is an excerpt from the book The Ad Contrarian (which you can download free here.)An article by Malcolm Gladwell, author of The Tipping Point, in The New Yorker leads me to believe that advertising people can learn something from spies. Not about stealing other peoples’ ideas, but about solving business problems.Gladwell tells us about a

Advertising Reflects Everything

The Ad Contrarian is on a well-deserved vacation this week. Here is a re-post from last March.Here in the San Francisco area we have something called "casual carpools." During rush hour, people line up, you pick them up in your car, and then you can cross the Bay Bridge in the carpool lane.I once picked up a crazy old lady who thought every license plate had a secret meaning. The whole trip she

Conversation With A CEO

CEO: Okay, why did you drag me down here?TAC: I heard you're not happy with your advertising and I want to talk to you about it.CEO: Advertising? I have important work to do...TAC: Advertising is important. It's your public personality. What's more important than that?CEO: Okay, maybe it's important...but I have a whole department...TAC: Yeah, that's the problem.CEO: Do you mean these people

A Humble Suggestion To Improve The Economy

I have an idea. It's not a big idea, it's a small one. But in these times, with deficits running into the zillions, I think every little bit helps.Here's my suggestion. I think we should use our laws for two years.This way, every other year we can send all the federal, state, and municipal lawmakers home and let them get back to annoying their families, instead of us.This will save us a lot of

Something Nice Happened

A very gratifying thing happened this week.We've been in New York producing music for a new campaign (yes, once in a while they still let me near advertising) and someone said something that brightened my day.As regular readers know, we have a few principles about advertising called "Performance-Based Advertising" (shameless self-promotion alert: more about it available free here.)The foundation

The Laziness Of Global Advertisers, Part 2

Yesterday we began a series called "The Laziness Of Global Advertisers." I wrote it as a 3-part series, but I condensed the final two parts into this one.Here's a good laugh from The Wall Street Journal:"For a global marketer...There is a whole infrastructure that you need to adapt and change ads (emphasis mine - TAC) so you can successfully market around the world," says Robert LePlae, president

The Laziness of Global Advertisers, Part 1

Today we start a 3-part series called "The Laziness of Global Advertisers."

Democracy is messy. It requires compromise. It allows for dissent. It takes time to get things done.

Nonetheless, it seems to be the best form of governance we've been able to devise.

Dictatorship is not not messy. Things can happen quickly. You don't need discussions. You don't have to pay attention to annoying

Friday On My Mind

Tweets From HellI know that one of the reasons you read this blog is that I'm always honest with you. Well, I have something to say kids, please sit down.I'm afraid that most of the entries in Wednesday's Dead Twitterers Contest were pretty freaking lousy. There I said it and I'm not sorry. My advice -- don't die. And if you do, don't Twitter.Nonetheless, I was able to pick 5 finalists (make that

Only In California, Part 3

California leads the way again with a groundbreaking economic recovery plan.Anyone need a CMO?

The Dead Twitterers Contest

Here at Ad Contrarian Global Headquarters, we're always looking for ways to make your life better.Today, we're even going to make your death better.How? By telling you how you can Twitter after you're dead! How awesome is that?You see, there's a website called Tweet Later where you can write tweets and schedule them to publish any time you want. So if you know when you're going to die, you can

Why Can't Marketers Talk Straight?

I sometimes play a game. As I'm walking down a street, I look at how people are dressed and divide them into two categories: those who are trying to stand out, and those who are trying to fit in.

I do a similar thing when I interview people. I listen to their language and analyze whether they are trying to cloud or clarify.

One way we can tell that the marketing and advertising industries are

Meet The New Boss, Same As The Old Boss

One of the very charming aspects of Web Maniac Disease (WMD) is the callow belief in the virtue of all things digital.For a wonderfully annoying look into the mind of a WMD sufferer, I wholeheartedly recommend The 95 Theses of The Cluetrain Manifesto, one of the foundational documents of the "conversationalist" school of web zealotry.Here are a few points from that document.8. In both